Networking with Schizophrenics Online is Hard

At some point, I will have to find an actual career. Until then, I am going to blog for a little while, just to let others know that it is possible to have a part-time job, go to graduate school full-time, while being a former mental patient diagnosed as schizo-affective.

The main idea people have of schizophrenics is that we go on rampage killings or that we are homeless or in boarding houses. According to the nimh site (national institute of mental health), 1% of Americans have been diagnosed as schizophrenic. According to the schizophrenia.com website, around 2 million Americans have schizophrenia. Where are these 2 million people? Homeless? With family? Independent? Incarcerated?

I go on youtube and forum boards, trying to network with other schizophrenics. The thing is that a number of us are paranoid subtypes. This can mean we are naturally distrustful, suspicious, cautious, and reluctant to reveal too much of ourselves. Or it can mean we think you, the reader, are a member of a shadowy secret organization intent on patrolling cyberspace, if I am to be totally honest. But usually our paranoid tendencies don’t manifest in totally outrageous conspiracy plots like that one, but in more mundane settings like being afraid of getting “outed” on the internet as a person with a mental health diagnosis. This can make us generally leery of chatting with other schizophrenics or about sharing our experiences as being schizophrenic.

I think I am different because I feel slightly more comfortable than other schizophrenics talking about my mental illness on the internet, where I have a fragment of anonymity. Also, I have taken my cocktail of pharmaceuticals regularly since 2009. That was the last time I was in the hospital, if I remember correctly. Being on medication regularly makes me feel almost normal. I will always have a paranoid streak, but at least now it is not a handicap.

My quest for kinship with other schizophrenics is at a standstill. I can’t find too many others who have benefited greatly from medication and can be reintegrated into society. I know they are out there. They just don’t post publicly online, which makes them difficult to network with.

If you are a schizophrenic, please network with others! We can share experiences, learn valuable lessons, and help the mental health system to evolve into a compassionate model of decent treatment services!

"Internet Bullies Make Me Nervous" & "Finding Daddy online"

Internet Bullies Make Me Nervous

Hello! I was just on my favorite website happily participating in the global cyber community, when suddenly---a woman I have never seen before typed in a very cruel remark and insulted me as a human. I  have my picture up and a link to my facebook page so I am concerned that said person will continue her angry tirade against me via other sites. This really makes me fear cyberspace. She not only intruded in my little world, but she spat out hateful words that I bet she would never say to my face. Online bullies are like closet sociopaths. They must all be outed!

I am still a little shaky from being berated by a stranger. If they humiliate you publicly, who knows what else they are capable of doing?

As for my sex life, it is nil. The only contact I have with the outside world is through cyberspace (one reason why I am so irritated by that woman who wrote insults all over the internet about me).

Finding Daddy Online

In other news, my father wound up in my email box. Apparently, we are both alumni from the same university. He made some "alumni hall of fame" and his little picture and name was listed in the email. My mother confirmed that he was my father. The man I never met and who never loved me, there, in my university email. This has not been a good week for me.