Comment on Alleged "Mentally Ill" Shooter

I have to do this every time some sociopath gets mistaken for a schizophrenic. Every damn time.

Here is a check list for schizophrenia:

Hears voices/auditory hallucinations for a period of time
Sees visions/visual hallucinations for a period of time
May have beliefs of one of the following: aliens, UFO's, persecution by the federal government
May believe him/herself to be a prophet
Likely to be disorganized in thought and speech. Will speak in neologisms (made up words), clanging (nonsense rhymes), or word salads (random strings of words).
May not bathe, eat, sleep, drink, speak for a period of time
Extremely likely to feel paranoia mixed with fear, may believe him/herself to be politically oppressed.
If manic, patient will likely not sleep for days on end.
May speak out loud to imaginary voices.

So. There. The claims of this anonymous police source said "history of mental illness and hospitalization"---> due to THREATS TO HURT OTHERS. THAT is NOT mental illness, that is hatred, anger management, sociopathic behavior, and manipulation. Why the hell was he put in a mental hospital and not in jail?! It is a felony to yell 'fire' in a crowded theater, but to threaten to kill people is not a criminal offense but a "mental health issue"?!

Here is his check list:

Threatened to hurt others
Obsessed with spree killers and guns
Hatred
Anger

Where, I ask, does it say voices, visions, paranoia, aliens, talking to imaginary voices, and insomnia??
It does not. This is bullshit propaganda trying to blame all mental patients for the acts of an angry, degenerate scumbag who never had the prototypical experiences of severe schizophrenia.

I really wonder if I am paranoid about my persecution beliefs, because it seems like this general public and the media love to handle all angry people as "the mentally ill." No, I hate to break it to you, but the worst men in all of history have been psychologically normal (i.e. Hitler, Pol Pot, Stalin, Dr. Goebbels, Dr. Mengele, Bin Laden, and so on). If you never accept a normal person as capable of evil acts you will never be able to stop them. Keep rounding up mental patients as scape-goats and you'll just have a bunch of lawsuits on your hands and future killers roaming around free and clear. Accept it. Normal people murder other every day. 

Making The Jump: One Foot Outta the Closet

Classes at the University begin this month and I finally did what I've been mulling about for the last two months: I requested to join the United Student Pride club, an LGBT club for lesbians, gays, bisexuals, transgendered, and transsexuals.

I knew eventually I'd have to own up to my physical and emotional attraction to females, I just postponed it by, oh, about 15 years. I've known since I was 13, when I was sleeping over at my best friend's house and I woke up aroused beside her. I looked at her and realized I wanted to caress her face and run my hand up her thigh and cradle her breasts in my hand. It was such a strong impulse I leaped out of bed and run around the house like a hyper cat. I suddenly felt free, real, sincere, eager, and scared. That was the first time I fell in love. Nothing came of it, we got into fights and we stopped talking. Then, men began to show a pushy interest in me and I let myself get pushed into relationship after relationship with men I was not attracted to. I had always watched the gay pride movement out of the corner of my eye, letting others do the hard work, while I hid in my bedroom masturbating to the pretty busty women of Swank films, and wishing I had the nerve to admit what I was.

I think if I had come out sooner I would have found a female lover by now, somebody that I really mesh well with. I also think I would have a greater sense of self and self-respect, since I would have been fighting for equality alongside my peers. I will always regret not coming out sooner, but the years flew by and I can't do anything about those years anymore.

Last month I attended the funeral of my 24 year old cousin who committed suicide June 25th. I miss him terribly but I vow not to let his life go out in vain. I will do what I must to prove that life is worth living. I will be true to myself and to others and not live a life of secrets, regrets, and shame.

Coming out to my University is just the first step. I also have to be honest about being a shizo-affective, a person who suffers from the biological disease of paranoid schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. Previously, I hid it from everybody but the people I already knew had a similar diagnosis. I can no longer pretend to be what I wanted to be: a straight girl with a"normal" mind. I have to be honest with others, even if that means losing some of them in the process.

And no, being crazy doesn't have anything to do with being a bisexual. I just got a colorful combination of genes when I was conceived.

Now I fit into nearly every minority out there: a Mexican-East Indian American mixed race, bisexual, schizo-affective, female from a low socio-economic area. The US consensus takers must be really frustrated with me, trying to pin down all the labels that apply!

Just writing this makes me feel less remorseful for my life of secrets.